My Horizontal Life...pales in comparison!

Woah!

This book was a breath of fresh air! It was super funny and if you love anything about Chelsea Handler it's her quick wit and sarcasm! She's got it going on and I kid you not when I tell you this one kept me laughing all the way through!

It's like the juiciest parts of everyone one of your favorite books all put together in one!

Pick up a copy for yourself! You'll enjoy it and either feel really good or really bad about your sex life...depending on the circumstances! ;)

Enjoy!

Time Flies...

Eight years ago today was a Saturday. I was preparing to make the biggest decision of my life (at the time) right here in my hometown.

I've learned so much about myself since the day I said "I Do". Marriage is an ever-changing animal. There are many factors that make up a marriage and I am constantly amazed by how folks make it work. Everyone's marriage is different. Some share loads of laundry while others don't; some marriages have the woman tending to the babies while others have stay-at-home dads. Of all the things I'll list below that I've learned from my eight years I will say that #1 has to be that you can't compare your marriage to anyone else's - NO MATTER WHAT!

The following are from different scenarios that may or may not have happened in my household during the past eight years.

When in an argument with your spouse (no matter the subject) it is not a good idea to utter the words, "Well, your simple mind just can't comprehend this." Nope. No matter how you say it, it won't end up good. Trust me.

When you're trying to get your point across, be sure you've at least pictured a response before you open your mouth. At least then you'll know what to expect. For instance...If you and your spouse are discussing marriage with somone that isn't (married), saying the following is most likely not throwing down your best card: "What you need to do is just find you the ugliest nice person you can find and settle; that's what I did." (Are those crickets I hear in the background?)

Should your spouse lose something of value that just happens to represent the very sanctity of marriage, it might not be in anyone's best interest to inquire as to whether or not they pawned the item in question. Especially if it's during a frantic search of air conditioning vents and sink drains. Not smart - at all.

I have found that raising children is hard work...but it doesn't come close to raising a marriage. It's so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and even easier to lose sight of how you got there.

I planned a trip for my significant other and I for a spa getaway this past weekend to celebrate eight years of putting up with each other. After a while you get comfortable. There's something to be said for comfort, I think. I mean, ladies, you can wander around in no make up and rollers in your hair and not worry...cause you're married. Guys, you can.....well, we all know what you do when you get comfy...and not worry, cause you're married. That being said, I think nurturing that "first date" feeling could go a long way.

We were "sight-seeing" around the venue and got off the beaten path a bit. My significant other proceeded to do that thing guys do when they're comfy around you....my eyes rolled. "Now if this were our first date, you wouldn't have done that!", I said. (My point here was that after eight years I hope I still give you that "first date" feeling of nervousness.) "If you're looking for first date antics, you're in the wrong place!", he replied. "That's why you get married - so you can be comfortable!" There's truth in both statements, I think. While the comfortable feeling that comes with it is grand, first date feelings are not overrated! It all takes nurturing and it's so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and forget how you got there. You forget who was with you along the way. And sadly, you can forget who you were when you started the journey.

Appreciation is often the first thing to go. I got news for ya'...that ain't good! Keep it out front and use the words, "Thank you! I appreciate that!", as often as you can. We don't think twice about saying something that could hurt the other's feelings...but for some reason we'll go months (or longer) without uttering these words. Think about this...if you're having a party and a guest offers to carry the trash downstairs for you, you wouldn't dare let it happen without a thank you to that person, right? But, on your average Monday evening when supper is going, kids are hollering and dogs are barking it's easy be miffed when your significant other might not think to take it out when it's full. You might ask and they comply...but how easy it is to forget to say "Thanks" when they do. There's the element of expectation there. Don't get me wrong...some expectation is good. But, what if simple thank you's along the way helped make them more frequent. Would that hurt? Not at all. And the beauty of it is that it goes for the guys and dolls!

Learn "I'm sorry". Learn when to insert it into the conversation. Timing is everything. It will only be beneficial to you - I promise.

Make it your goal each day to brighten that person's day somehow. In today's techno savvy world, a "thinking of you" is just a text or email away. Make it happen.

Bottom line...you have to laugh. Everyone else will be, anyway. Life is funny...don't think God sits up there watching documentaries and dramas all day! A little comedy is good for the soul.

Now...go; nurture; act like it's your first date...let me know how it goes!

Idol Love! Don't laugh...it beats the hell out of "Rock of Love"!

I'm in love - with three guys! Who are the lucky (or perhaps not-so-lucky) fellas? David Archuleta - Yeah, he's young. So. You got somethin' to say about it? I didn't think so. He's just about the cutest thing to happen to Idol. Not to mention the fact that he's got talent oozing from his pores. I'm not sure he'll win it...but his rendition of "Imagine" by John Lennon a few weeks back still sends shivers down my spine! I think mostly he might be my favorite because he reminds me (on a distant level) of a guy named Jacob Messina that I grew up with. Jacob posessed quite a set off pipes as well and the similarities are somewhat of a comfort! Jason Castro - I'll be honest here...it's the eyes. They are mesmerizing! They draw me in everytime and I just can't help but be entranced. Sigh...I'm a victim here. One of my favorite performances of his is "If I Fell". Granted it's probably not his best...and I'm sure he'll keep getting better, but it's just so nice. He's on the stool, playing his guitar and he seems so at ease with it all. I could do without the dreads...if I'm being honest. But, I think part of what intrigues me about him is how long he'll go through the competition before he cuts 'em. Care to place your bet? David Cook - Okay...my favorite! He's the Chris Daughtry of this season and WHEW!! did I love me some Daughtry! Talk about a sexy bald guy...sigh!!!!! David's a rocker - and not in a washed up, Bret Michaels kind of way...a real one. He's got a great way of taking a song and making it his own. When he performed "Hello" by Lionel Richie and it had the rock 'n' roll edge...he won me over! I'm a huge Lionel fan anyway and David's updated version sounds like something I would buy from ITunes. Nevertheless, I'm pretty sure he could sing the alphabet and I'd tune in. Maybe it's his biceps as he strums, or the half-cocked smile from the right side of his mouth he'll throw at you when he's singing. Maybe it's the whole package...whatever it is, he's got it! It won't surprise me a bit when he walks away the winner in May. So, these are my faves. Yours?

Reasoning...from a 5 year old!

So, most of you are aware of the new 'lady friend' in my little boy's life. Her name is Gabrielle and, from what I hear, she's "all that and a bag of chips!" Still not having met this little chickie, I'm understandably skiddish. I mean, what are her intentions, exactly? Shouldn't this be discussed?

I'm kidding....partly. So, after the inaugural drawing came home introducing Miss Gabby to me, I was surprised to find out that the following week he was comtemplating a "break-up". HE'S FIVE!!!!!!!!!! I arrived to pick him up from school and the teacher tells him to "think about it before he makes any rash decisions." "What's she talking about?", I asked. "Oh, nothing.", he replied. "I'm just thinking about breaking up with Gabrielle.", he finished.

Turns out, after much poking and prodding, that his reasoning happened to be because she cheers for the wrong team. That's right...apparently, she's an Alabama fan. At our household, we pull for the Auburn Tigers (WAR EAGLE!!!!) and he saw this as reason enough that it just wasn't going to work out. He actually told the teachers at his school that his "family won't put up with that!" How hilarious is that? How's that for die hard?

Needless to say, he decided to give her another shot when she converted for him. I just might like this girl after all ;) I had to laugh at this...and I did - out loud, in fact. If only all life's decisions were that simple, huh?

Who's That Girl?

My son comes home with a plethora of information in his backpack everyday of the week! I'm overwhelmed each afternoon with junk information, lunch money requests, vocabulary words, drawings, lunchroom menus and weekly agendas. It demands a good portion of my time to pilfer through it all and determine what gets my attention and what goes into the trash file! The drawings always get my attention. From carefully crafted silhouettes of Spider-Man and Super-Man to rockets and football fields...my fridge looks like a mini Louvre (of sorts) and that's fine by me! When else will I have the joy of covering my Frigidaire?

I might have known this one was on its way...the illustrious "girlfriend" picture. So, her name is Gabrielle. I've never met her - not sure I want to, to be perfectly honest. He proceeded to tell me that she gave him a hug when they parted this afternoon. With tears streaming down my face, I expressed interest in this "special friend" - don't give me any grief...it's been a crazy day today! I'll do my best to adjust and accept this new little philly into my world...for as long as she's here, anyway.

Lipstick Jungle!!!

I went to my first "screening" tonight! It was fun! The pilot episode of Lipstick Jungle was worth the energy I exerted to get there!

This show is gonna be great! I urge you all to tune in when it airs February 3rd on NBC. Starring Brooke Shields, Kim Raver and Lindsay Price, this show is coming in on the coattails of Sex and the City and it's getting off to a great start. They all three play very successful women that deal with having to answer for their decisions when their male counterparts don't! They are all dealing with their own issues and insecurities, families and fashion.

I think what I love most is Brooke Shields...of course, Lindsay Price - who you may remember from Beverly Hills 90210 as Steve's girlfriend (and later his wife) and the surprise was Andrew McCarthy! I know everyone remembers Mannequin and Weekend at Bernie's.

So, tune in and let me know what you think!

Get your popcorn ready...it's movie time!

I love the movies! If I had a weekend where I didn’t have to do a damn thing (and I couldn't spend money at the spa) I would lay in bed all day long watching movies...back to back to back! I'm quick to throw you a line from a favorite...often just to test you! I wouldn't necessarily say I'm partial to any particular genre of film, but the romantic comedies are probably up there pretty high! I'm partial to these, most likely, because of the desperate longing for 'Mr. Right' as I was growing up. Go ahead...get your laughs in now. I don't want you passing out from the hysteria when I unload that Cocktail happens to be one of my favorite romantic comedies! I mean, what female hasn't longed for their very own Brian Flanagan - tortured yet charismatic; driven yet held back by his own internal demons. All right maybe my mission growing up was to help them or fix them…ha! If I’d known then what I know now, I wouldn’t have so many favorite romantic comedies, I assure you! You may be wondering what made me want to write this and exactly what it is I'm intending to enlighten you with....well, here you go: I was watching Legends of the Fall - one of my all time favorites - and I asked myself..."Does anyone of the male species look better on horseback than Brad Pitt?" I’m all about finding the truth…so my quest began. ;) Brad Pitt (strange as he probably is in real life) is most breathtaking atop a thoroughbred! I don’t even have to get into the fact that he’s aching, tormented and unreachable at times during the film…all of which only add to the mysterious nature that will drive a woman mad, literally. **For the readers of the male persuasion, I hope you take from this entry a little more about what (most) women want. A man is most desirable when he’s determined. For instance, he’s working on a task/chore/hobby/work and he’s driven to see it through to completion. This is hot. Especially if he encounters a “roadblock” and must work through it. I’d love to elaborate on why…but, honestly, it’s a little muddy to me. A man is also alluring when he’s vulnerable. Now, don’t misconstrue this. Too vulnerable can make you needy…which should be noted as NOT HOT for future reference. But, a degree of vulnerability is welcomed. It proves you have feelings. Speaking of feelings…something else that makes you most fascinating is the desire to learn more about yourself. Too often men can get caught in a rut and become complacent with who they are and their ‘mate’. Don’t do this! Always strive to take something away from situations. Try not to see everything black and white – even though you might be programmed that way – because words are hard to find to describe the feelings you can invoke by admitting that you learned something new about yourself. It professes self-awareness and the desire to better your self.** My quest carried me through a spectrum of films looking for the crème de la crème of romantic lead roles among men in movies – horseback or not. They are as follows (in no particular order and may or may not be in the saddle): Justin Matisse played by the stunningly Southern, Harry Connick, Jr. in Hope Floats. Tripp played by the unquestionably ravishing Matthew McConaughey in Failure to Launch. Benjamin Barry also played by Matthew McConaughey in How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. Steve Edison again played by Mr. Hottie McConaughey in The Wedding Planner. (complete with the aforementioned horseback scene!) Johnny Castle played by the smoldering Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing. Robbie Hart played by the side-splitting Adam Sandler in The Wedding Singer. Dusty Chandler played by the timeless Mr. George Strait in Pure Country. Roy McAvoy played by Kevin Costner in Tin Cup. Ronny Miller played by the exquisite Patrick Dempsey in Can’t Buy Me Love. Drew Baylor played by the positively adorable Orlando Bloom in Elizabethtown. Nick Marshall played by the handsome Mel Gibson in What Women Want. Lloyd Dobler played by the atypical hottie John Cusack in Say Anything. Jack Taylor played by the captivating George Clooney in One Fine Day. Nick Mercer played by the enchanting Dermot Mulroney in The Wedding Date. Aragorn and Legolas played by the enchanting Viggo Mortensen and Orlando Bloom (respectively) in The Lord of the Rings: The Trilogy. It goes without saying these two are most assuredly Brad's stiffest competition in the horesback category. All of these candidates qualify, in my book, for romantic comedy role (by someone of the male persuasion) of the century! I’m sure there are some I’m leaving out and I’m sure there are some I haven’t thought of. I’m curious about the ones I may not have seen…I’ll make a weekend of it if I have to. I’m willing to do what it takes to uncover the truth. So, send me your favorites! (Guys…that means you too!) My DVD player is ready and waiting! Guys...take your cues from the one's I've mentioned here. I know they're only actors playing a role, but they all have something women want - romance. We want to be swept off our feet. Again, I'm not speaking for all the ladies...I'm sure there are some out there that don't agree. But, ultimately, we want to feel adored. Whether it's up close or from across the room. We want to feel like we're at the forefront of your mind...even if we aren't. There's something to be said for romance....see you at the movies!